Get Into the Boat: Fostering Emotional Health
By Krisie Brown
Jesus felt stress?!? Really. As humans we’re no strangers to stress. The stress of an overfull day, a lengthy to-do list, responsibilities for family, work, friends. The stress and mess of relationships. The stress and frustrations throughout the day as we try to complete our to-dos. But Jesus? Stressed? This concept hit me as I sat in Pauline Morgan’s class on “Emotional Intelligence and Our Faith Walk” at this year’s By Design ReTREAT in April.
Pauline started out with this thought experiment. Imagine you’re in the grocery store, and as you enter the checkout line someone comes behind you and inches closer and closer. Soon their cart bumps into your backside. What do you do? Ignore it, inch up a bit, bump your backside back into their cart, turn around and say something? Well, let’s say you inch up and choose not to say anything; it must have been an accident, an oversight. Then here comes their cart again – bump. Frustration, anger, hurt, stress, all these emotions might come in that moment. Let’s ask that popularized question from the ’90s, “What would Jesus do?”
Pauline took us to a story found in Mark 4:1-2: Jesus was being pressed. There were throngs of people who wanted something from Him. He was by the sea of Galilee with His back to the water, facing the masses. These were people who wanted to hear His teaching to decide for themselves was He a prophet, the Messiah? These were sick people; they wanted to see His power for themselves, they wanted healing through His power. Whatever it was, they all wanted something. And so, they pressed around Him, inching closer, trying to get a good view, trying to reach out and touch Him, trying to have their needs heard and met. What did Jesus feel in that moment? What emotions was He dealing with?
Jesus had physical needs, emotional needs as a human in that moment, a need for space and not to be pushed from the shore into the sea as the crowd pressed in, a need to complete His mission of love and teaching. And He was fully divine, so He knew the needs of the crowd pressing around Him – He had compassion for them, and He loved them.
So, what did Jesus do? He got into a boat.
Now this is some emotionally intelligent, outside-the-box problem solving that meets Jesus’ needs and the crowd’s. This move to the boat affords Jesus space from the crowds. His position on the sea helps all to be able to see Him. And the amplification of the water allows the crowd to hear His teaching about God’s love and kingdom.
How do we grow in our own emotional intelligence? How do we become more like Jesus in this story?
Going back to our opening thought experiment, back to that grocery checkout line, someone shared in the class that they would move to the front of their own cart, to create space and a barrier between them and the other cart. I couldn’t even think of that solution while sitting calmly in a beautiful setting during the class. How would I ever be so inspired in a stressful moment with a wise solution? Alleluia for the gift of the Holy Spirit.
We seek Jesus, daily, moment by moment. In-the-moment “Please, help” prayers under our breath. Regularly, in daily time with Him to allow Him to search us and show us where we’ve fallen short, and ask for His help to change and deal with a similar situation better next time. By taking deeper, longer periods of time to go further with God in prayer, with a therapist or in a group learning together at a retreat.
Jesus climbing into the boat to deal with the stress of the crowd was just one of several examples that Pauline walked us through. These examples of men and women in the Bible who were emotionally intelligent enough to recognize their own emotions, see the needs of others, and discern a wise solution brought the subject of emotional intelligence alive and made it accessible.
As I pondered how to continue to be aware of my own emotions and deal with them in a healthier way, I wrote a prayer. I hope to practice this prayer daily as well as identify strong emotions and journal about them to allow God to help me handle them better next time. I am so grateful to have been a part of Pauline’s class and have had the opportunity to allow God to continue to work in me to grow my emotional intelligence.
Lord, I thank You that Jesus felt all these feelings.
Help me to stop and pray when I feel things strongly,
to pause and seek You and not sin in my reactions.
When I do, Lord help me to turn to You quickly.
Be in my processing of these emotions.
Show me a better way for next time.
Lord, help me to learn self-discipline
by Your power, to show Your love in all I do.
Amen
“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” – 2 Timothy 1:7
If you would like to have Pauline Morgan teach this class in your church, please contact us.
You can download Krisie’s prayer card here to print it for your own use.
Krisie Brown has been involved in both the Women’s and Children’s Ministries at First Congregational Church of Hamilton for close to 30 years. She and her husband live in Ipswich, MA with their three children (Morgan, Calvin, and Sydney). Currently, she is on the board of By Design Ministries and the teaching team for the Women’s Bible Study at her church. Krisie loves to be involved at church and in her children’s schools, building community.